The Cycle of Life

I’ve tried killing myself so many times

I’ve stopped counting.  The banality of life

Sickens me.  Life after life, the same old

Humdrum that buzzes in your ear like a

Pesky fly not ready to be caught just yet.

You name it, I’ve done it.  From slitting my wrists

To downing a cocktail of pills.  From self-

Immolation to self-asphyxiation;

Nothing works.  Karma’s a bitch, “they” say

And “they” are right.  But Reincarnation

Is nothing more than incarceration.

What they forget to teach you in Bible school

Is that Hell is not hot.  There is no lake

Of fire, nor is there even a devil.

No, Hell is something much more sinister

Than something as unimaginative

As a human barbeque pit.

You know when you dream, you tend to forget

It when you wake up, but every once

And a while you have a dream that haunts you

For days?  That is what Hell truly is.

Hell is when something horrible happens

In your life and you are unable to

Turn your head and knowing you can’t do

Anything about it; that is truly Hell.

I’ve tried killing myself so many times

I have forgotten why I even try,

But when you have eternity

To figure out what you did wrong in life,

What’s the rush?

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